just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Randomize