Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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