Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize
