He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
