Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize