Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize