Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I think we might need a safe word for this...
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
