I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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