it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize