I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
she pinky promised me she was 18
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
