Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
