I think my vagina is haunted
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
My day in three words: secret purse cake
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
