He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
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