my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Randomize
