I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize