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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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