I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
