Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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