This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
