I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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