was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
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