Me. At least after what I've been through.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
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