did you get engaged???
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I cockslap morals
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Your cock deserves a montage
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
