you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
