She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
