Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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