Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
