Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
