haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
