we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
