I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
apparently the secret to your success is patron
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Just pee around me
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Randomize
