Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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