I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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