eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
