"it" just moved
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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