Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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