I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
