butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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