they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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