Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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