we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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