She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Randomize
