She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
