Your face is a jimmy john
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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