we have officially lost it.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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