you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Randomize