I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
