Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize