she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize