hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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